I am SO not sublating today. It's 2:30 PM and I am, like, blogging. I had a major deadline yesterday, which I missed, and now I just cannot catch a wave. Does Malibu Barbie ever roll out of her picturesquely-rumpled bed in Aufhebung Dream House at 9:00, scratch, make a big elaborate production of coffee, read two New Yorker articles about overachieving super-rich Jews, take a BATH, check the garden, blog for a while, and then, finally, paddle maybe one wavelength out before being so crippled by dread that she simply returns to shore, picks up the New Yorker again, and sits on the edge of her easy-chair half-reading, her shoulders around her ears, heart racing with anxiety because she's not working? Doubt it. Malibu Georg-Wilhelm didn't name it Aufhebung Dream House for nothing. As anyone who's ever partied there knows, the place is positively humming with Historical Imperative. Hell, I met Oprah there!
But that was then. Countless waves have swelled and crashed upon the shores of the Ideal since I last stood there, my brow furrowed with concentration, my eyes piercing the horizon of immanence and transcendence. I grew weary. A bitter wind from the Schopenhauer archipelago tore the flesh from my bones, and I could no longer bear aloft the Comprehensive Philosophical Framework, even in the relatively manageable MP3 format. All the compound nouns and crashing consonants broke my will, and, finally, I was beguiled by Nature in the guise of Freedom, and now I am a slave indeed. Barbie wouldn't recognize me if I tried to friend her.
Dude, Barbie totally thinks you're hot. But she's not worth it. Don't be her little trophy.
ReplyDeleteBy far my most popular post EVER. Almost 1,200 hits to date. They must be Googling "Comprehensive Philosophical Framework".
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